Just like a good Catholic priest, ZOO is here to offer our forgiving ear to all the misbehaving vixens out there. But where we're different is that when they tell us, we tell you!

Come back every week for the naughties sex secrets of Britain's devilish nymphos-next-door.

Super Sex Drive
I have a big appetite for sex and get horny at inappropriate moments. Last week, when my guy and me were driving home from the cinema along some dark, empty roads, I was getting pretty hot thinking about the sexy new lingerie I was wearing. So I decided to give him a sneak preview.

I could tell by the bulge in his crotch area that he liked what he saw. I was really turned on and started touching myself. Knowing he couldn’t give me his full attention, I made sure he heard how much I was enjoying it.

When I thought I couldn’t stand it anymore, he pulled over, hauled me onto his lap and finally gave me what I needed.
- Susan J, Dublin


Pulled Off at Half Time
On a really hot day last summer, I wandered into a park with some girlfriends where we found a group of lads drinking beer and vodka and playing football.

We sat down to watch them but they quickly abandoned the game and we were soon all drinking and flirting. I got talking to one of the lads who made it obvious how sexy he found me.

Every time I looked away, I felt his eyes admiring what was barely concealed by my bikini top and hotpants, so I decided to give him a little more to contend with. Playfully sitting on his lap, I could feel his trousers straining against my bum, especially when I reached around and carefully began stroking what I found there.

No one paid us any attention – even as I slipped my hand down his shorts. I love oral and I was getting so wet imagining having him in my mouth. So we snuck off to the pub across the road from the park, to use the facilities.

And we did… but in a way that would’ve got us both barred if anyone had found us.
- Hannah, Peterborough

Morning After Thrill
I’ve got one sure-fire hangover cure: having an orgasm. So when I woke up after a house party on a strange sofa, with a shocking headache and an unfamiliar bloke passed out on the floor next to me, I delicately put my fingers to work.

I pulled back the blanket some thoughtful person had laid across me and started touching myself – as quietly as possible, so as not to wake up the sleeping stranger. Getting more and more excited, I was pretty close to climaxing when I realised that the slumbering bloke was slumbering no more, and was watching me intently as I played with myself.

He was also quite fit, so I beckoned him over to join me for the main event. My hangover certainly didn’t bother me again that day.
- Heidi, Aylesbury


Lapping It Up
My boyfriend bought me a lap dance with a girl recently. It felt so sexy as she writhed naked, up against me, with her nipples brushing my skin. I could tell she was really turned on too and she asked me to meet her out the back. When I returned 40 minutes later, I was a new woman!
- Dina, Durham

Steamy Shower
I’m on my local netball team and got involved in some “dirty” play at a tournament last month.

I’d noticed a rival team member watching me during one of our games, so after the last match I headed to their changing rooms to look for her. I wanted to ask whether she knew me.

She was in there alone and had stripped down to her bra and thong, ready to shower off. We stood staring at each other, the tension crackling between us. I’m pretty secure about my sexuality but I was so turned on as I stared at her long legs and glistening breasts, I could barely move.

She then undid her bra slowly and deliberately, threw it on the floor and slipped out of her knickers. She led me into the showers, where she removed my now soaking clothes and lathered me up, cleaning every bit of me before moving south with her tongue.

It was the hottest shower I’ve ever had. I can’t wait for next year’s tournament.
- Jess G, Bunbury


GIRLS GET IT OFF YOUR CHEST!

Done something naughty? Then we want to hear. Send your titillating tales of illcit adventure to girls@zootoday.com. Or just post them in comments below.*

* Please note, ZOO offers no guarantee of redemption.